ROV Juvenile Home Project

By Sajitha Rasheed

 

The Childrens’ Home is a Govt home for care and protection of children (under 18). They are not ‘criminals’. They are brought to the home to be taken care of. Some are orphans, some were vagabonds, some are brought forward by their own parents due to difficulty in taking care of them and some are brought over as victims in abuse, violence etc. Some girls are victims and witnesses to rape, sexual abuse legal cases, so their lives are in danger if they are allowed to go out of the home. 

 

From among the other girls, around 30 of them attend schools. As of now, there are around 120-126 inmates. The number would increase during summer vacations as girls studying in boarding schools will return back. 

 

As it is a care and protection program, the girls cannot be legally employed by the home. They are idle most of the day, with a lot of energy to go about which are used, many a times, in destructive ways than proactive. They are bright kids, talented too. Our aim here is to channelize this energy into more proactive, self developing, nurturing ways and mold them into productive, happy individuals. Yes, this is going to be a slow, looooong process and it will take us a lot of investment – in terms of time, patience and genuine care for them.

 

There are 3 large rooms which accommodate around 30 children per room. Each room has 2 toilets and 1 bathroom. As of now, there’s no segregation in the housing in terms of age. (the youngest is 5 yrs old and oldest 17). There’s a water supply problem, in it being irregular. Even if it comes, the girls do not take responsibility in making sure that the water is saved or the plumbing handled with care. There’s a lot of disciplining, with love, that needs to be done here. There are 6 care takers but at a given time, only around 4 would be available. They have just one room with a few beds to take a break in. It is also their permanent residence cos they are all outstation candidates.   

 

A doctor, psychiatrist, yoga instructor, etc. are supposed to visit once a week. It does not always happen. There are 2 teachers to teach reading and writing to kids who are not literate. They have recently started studying computer. MAD visits every weekend to teach English, Hindi and Maths. Other groups from colleges too visit to conduct programs, now and then. As of now, after seeing the report that came in IE, the Gynec’s assctn in Cochin has volunteered to do a medical camp, free, at the home. (as many girls do have gynec problems due to sexual abuse metted out to them earlier.)

 

Objective

 

• To adopt the Childrens Home at Kakkanad by our Organization named ‘Raising Our Voices’ as a long term commitment. 
• To spend time with the children and for the children, to guide, provide and facilitate in their all round development.
• To contribute to their becoming happy, self confident, self sustaining, productive adults.

The Plan

• Each room of children to be assigned to 3 volunteer ‘mothers’. These mothers would spend time with the children creating a rapport, trust and circle of love, over a period of time.
• Each mother would spend 1- 2 hours a week, so a total of 3 – 6 hours by all the 3 mothers would be dedicated to one room of children.
• The ‘mothers’ would prepare a monthly time table in consultation with the home, which when finalised, would be adhered to.
• The mothers will give lessons in reading, writing and Arithmetic, if necessary. They hope to inculcate in the children a love for books… be it reading, writing or painting. They will have reading sessions, do a book review, have discussions on the book they read. May be watch movies or other educational programs and then have discussions on them.
• The mothers will guide to channelize their energy in to proactive activities like gardening, sports, cooking, dancing, singing, developing skills, talents, etc.
• The mothers will ensure that the children assigned to her are physically healthy and clean. Ensure that nails are cut, baths are taken, de-lice their hair, clean clothes are worn, etc.
• Mothers will guide to instill a sense of discipline in them and impart lessons in being responsible for their belongings and the home.
• If needed, religious lessons can be imparted to children who ask for it.
• Create a sense of family, love and belonging.
• Hold healthy competitions like ‘the cleanest room’, ‘the best vegetable patch’, best dancer, singer, painter, sports, etc.
• Create a library for the children.
• Find funds to provide material things like new clothes, under clothes, stationary, books, toys, etc.

A Beginning: Blogging on the eve of International Women’s Day

Its been about two months since on a freak morning I sent out a mail to my women friends in Kochi and my alter egos all over the world. I was sick of the constant reports I saw in the papers about violence towards women. I was sick of how everything told women that they should do this and not that, and yet we got hurt, again and again. I was sick of the way ‘Nirbhaya’ died in Delhi.

Raising Our Voices started that freak morning. I was overwhelmed by the immediate response I got. It was apparent that the questions which bothered me, the realities which I had a hard time swallowing, bothered other people also, troubled them, gnawed at them. There were women around me who felt as strongly that the time has come to put our thoughts, our anguishes, our worries for the future of our children to actions. We were tired of just complaining. Now we wanted to have a hand in creating the world we wished for – for ourselves as well as our children.

8^th March is celebrated worldwide as International Women’s Day. IWD emerged as emerged from the activities of labour movements at the turn of the twentieth century in North America and across Europe. In 1975, during International Women’s Year, the United Nations began celebrating International Women’s Day on 8 March. Two years later, in December 1977, the General Assembly adopted a resolution proclaiming a United Nations Day for Women’s Rights and International Peace to be observed on any day of the year by Member States, in accordance with their historical and national traditions. In adopting its resolution, the General Assembly recognized the role of women in peace efforts and development and urged an end to discrimination and an increase of support for women’s full and equal participation. You can read more about the History of International Women’s Day.

The official United Nations theme for International Women’s Day 2013 is “A promise is a promise: Time for action to end violence against women.” Read more about the UN’s vision regarding IWD here. In his address to the world community prior to the day, Ban Ki Moon – the UN Secretary General spearheads the UN Campaign with UNite – a campaign dedicated to end violence towards women.

 

It seems, that the gender agenda is gaining momentum. It seems that atlast, the world is waking up to the sordid deal it has given half its population. 1/3 of whom have experienced some form of violence or the other. It seems its time.

So what has been the thought about ROV? Frankly that morning I sent out that mail, I was not sure myself, what I was looking for. It was just the desperation that I felt, and that I soon learnt was shared by many. I was thinking just about speaking out – a rally, a gathering, a show of strength which said that we are not going to put up with being beaten up, violated, stifled, silenced and killed anymore. But as we sat across each other every week, time stolen from our precious ones, our work which we have dedicated our lives to, and talked and shared, something more germane, more valuable took root. The passion I saw amongst all of us, which made us rush out of our regular lives at 5 every Thursday, to meet, to talk, to laugh made us believe that we have the power. Power to change the world around us. Power to touch people who are less fortunate. Power to make a difference.

Today we stand together – a group of 25 odd women, from a motley of backgrounds. We have professionals amongst us, business women, doctors, journalists, home makers and at the same time we are all mothers, wives, daughters, sisters. Yet none of these words define us. We are us – individuals, human beings, people. We juggle all these roles every day that we find ourselves in, but we don’t want to be lost in them. We want to still know we are by ourselves, we want to seek, we want to find out.

So is ROV a platform for our self exploration? May be – why not? Who says that the journey for self emancipation can ever be over? And in our personal emancipation lies the solution of emancipation for our entire society – men and women. I firmly believe that the first step towards becoming productive members of the society comes through self knowledge. Through connecting with our own needs and learning to voice them. Not selfishly, but firmly. And that strength we gather, from this connection within ourselves and with each other can produce an energy which we can then project outwards and touch other lives, lives which are less fortunate than ours. Or our next generation. The society around us. We be the change we want to see.

A point which always confronts any group based on gender work is, are we against men? The word ‘gender’ involves men and women, and gender balance cannot be achieved without all genders working together to achieve that equality. Patriarchy is a construct of our today’s society, but it surely does equal evils to men as it does women (though I admit that men get killed less often than women in the alter of Patriarchy). In creating imbalances in our society, by loading it in certain groups favour, by forcing people to perform within the strict confines of roles relegated by their gender, patriarchy does equal harm to men and women. And this battle cannot be won without we all working together. This is not ‘against’ anyone. It’s a platform of inclusion for all people who believe in equality.

On our International Women’s Day program we float our first couple of projects. We have reached out to the Government Juvenile Home which houses girls from 4 years to 17. These girls are often abuse victims, or abandoned street children. They come from various backgrounds. We are investing ourselves to take on these children as our children, invest ourselves in becoming their mothers. In loving them, caring for them. Seeing that they can grow up unscarred by their traumatic past. Will we be successful? Who knows. But we hope to make a difference.

When we met for the first time, one of our common concerns was for our children. As mothers we were all concerned as to how we can bring up our children in a more gender balanced way, where the women are strong and confident and the men are sensitive and caring. Keeping this in mind, and also to assist our children face the myriad dangers in the outside world, to cope with the high levels of abuse and violations that children face in today’s world, to educate them to understand their rights of saying ‘No’, not just to peer pressure, or sexual predators, but to drugs, violence and other such dangers, we have put together a series of workshops for English medium school going kids of various age groups, which we are hopeful that schools would allow us to run parallel to their curriculum.

A great start has been made in bringing us all together to talk about our health concerns – stuff we don’t find in books, stuff many of us still don’t know as we knock on the doors of pre – menopause.

This is us on 7^th of March, 2013. We only have the way forward from here.